Meet Matthew Epstein
“Hello Google. My name is Matthew Epstein. I want to join your product marketing team, bad.”
The Top 10 Reasons Google Should Hire Me
David Letterman Style.
I have a mustache.
You can always trust a man with a mustache. Did I mention I have a mustache? I do.
I invested over $3,000 of my own capital to create a marketing campaign that would get you to notice me. I haven’t been that desperate to get someone to notice me since my first high school crush.
I more or less already work for Google. I spend hours every day working in Google Chrome, Google Gmail, Google Reader, Google Calendar, Google Search, Google Maps, Google Navigation, Google Places, Google YouTube and more.
Just like Google I do no evil. Well, except on the weekends.
I look good in a suit.
I work well in teams, I can communicate across departments to meet objectives and I pay attention to detail.
Technology is my best friend. In full disclosure though, I have no friends…so technology kind of won by default.
I really can’t stress enough that you should hire me solely on the fact that I have a mustache, regardless of whether or not it’s real.
This isn’t for the LOLs. I’m actually in this to win it. I have offline and online marketing experience and an obsessive desire to create winning go-to-market strategies. I believe my proven career record, my passion for marketing and my obsession with technology can bring significant value to the Google team.